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December 2009 Archives

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kiwis always talk about new years with an 's'.  so there you go.  happy new years to ya mate.  sweet as.

we went to a new year's party last night where we pretended midnight was at 10pm and did a countdown then so we could all get home and to bed.  it was perfect.  And they have both new year's day and the day after as bank holidays.  what a brilliant plan.  i write this in the gap between our made up new year and the proper kiwi new year at midnight.  which is 13 hours ahead of the UK.  so in total our 2009 lasted 13 hours less than all my other full calendar years)

anyway, my new year's (years'?) resolution is to sort out comments on the blog.  i fear i may need to take some drastic action.  but i aim to get it sorted in the next week or so.  (let's see how i get on with that !).

this time last year moving to New Zealand was just a teeny weeny thought in the back of our brains.  and now we're here.  aim high friends.  the world is your oyster.  go for it before it's all too late !  (and let me know how you get on.)

God bless.  funkypancake 09

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it's totally fab living within 5 minutes drive of at least two crazy golf courses.  they really cater to the british ex-pats !

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kiwis call sweets "lollies".  makes me laugh everytime

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we went to a marine reserve yesterday and it was very excellent.

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kezia's flip flop fell in the water at one point, but we fished it back out

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you can snorkel there.  but we didn't this time

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instead we went on a glass bottom'd boat.  made with real bottoms i think

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after that we went down the coast and the girls did some boogie boarding.

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coast is an anagram of coats which is appropriate for england, but not for here.  it's blummin boilin.

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too much ice cream shoved in to too small a cone was always going to be trouble.  the proprietor pointed out the crack in the cornet before handing it over.  then he saw esther struggling so brought her a little tub to put it in to. but the tub was too small so he then brought a plate and a spoon.  that's what happens when you are generous to start with.  you have to follow it up with more generosity or the whole thing back fires.

let that be a lesson to al of us.

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these sheep were on the inside of a fence in the garden side of the property.  it was a rental property.  esther suggested they had rented it out for the week.

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i broke my 'no socks' rule as i've seen so few gloves since we moved to new zealand.  this is particularly upsetting given it's prime glove season in the UK right now.  so here's a sock with a lion on instead.

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only in new zealand ...

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there's esther and kezia in the sea on their new boogie boards.  i didn't spot the 'fin' in the background at the time.  gulp

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at last, we have a way to control crumpets in our house.  long overdue.

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i just did a spell check on bollesha (which i suspect i spelt wrong) and was quite surprised by the spell checker's first option.  or perhaps it was a comment on my spelling.  blush

anyway, they don't have balls on sticks on their crossings over here.  it's so bright they can get away with flourescent orange circles instead.  they work a treat

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a good collection of signage here.  well worth a click for bigness.  their moto is 'say what you want to say and keep saying it until they understand'.

or perhaps they are making sure they have a sign for every height of customer.  although that doesn't work right as the "xmas day" (inverted commas) signs are side by side, perhaps for couples walking through

and i very much like that "shop lifters will be detained"

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bit too tired and rather too hot to do a proper blog post today i'm afraid, but just to say we had a fab time with bignoseduglyguy (above) and family yesterday during our first highly enjoyable kiwi christmas which involved much eating, swimming, drinking and laughing.

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there were various excellent quotes from the day but my favourite was the made up answer to our joke creation. 

it helps if you know there's a road called the 'desert road' (one 's') in New Zealand.

i though there must be a joke in there somewhere and got us all to think of good answers to the joke question of "what driving offence could you be arrested for on the dessert road"

there were various great answers, but my favourite was "i was jelly frightened".  it made no sense at the time either but we laughed til the tears ran down our faces.


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we were even able to meet a local celebrity chef !

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i hope you all had fab christmases !

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sometimes it's best not to abbreviate the word 'number' with 'no'.

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esther saw the funny side of her lovely present to me so she kindly let me share it.



if you really want to mess with your brain get more than one version playing at the same time out of sync. i've given you some more below to play at the same time (thanks to my mum for this fantastic idea):



not quite as good as this though which is what we're experiencing (the sun part, not rolf or his status quo chums)

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we decided to have our traditional christmas roast outside on christmas eve as we're out with friends doing the 'kiwi christmas' BBQ thing tomorrow.  so here are some photos of our day

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out with brussel sprouts, in with asparagus.  you always need something people will think is really yucky on the plate.

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a new set of cracker jokes.  not sure about websites being 'trendy'.  who has a website these days ?  it's all about facebook my friend.

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here are jane's avante-garde mince pies

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home made board games (by esther)

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the giant santa in downtown auckland, recently received a facelift so it looks less like a child catcher.  it wasn't a good look previously apparently.

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we also had lunch of bangers and mash in a hardware shop.  posh in a down to earth kind of way.  you've got to love this country

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happy christmas everyone !

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the scary mannequin in our local maul has been joined by an equally scary doll.

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for the last few years we've put on our warmest coats and gone to the local xmas tree place and cut down our own christmas tree.  but we've now moved to new zealand and haven't been able to locate a cut it yourself xmas tree place.

so instead we went to a local tree place "trees to please" said the sign.  and a man with a permed mullet carried a precut tree to our car.

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then we dragged it in to the house and popped it in the corner ready to decorate

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here's some more of our house if you are interested (getting ready for a raclette with friends on sunday evening)

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hi.  this is a cross-post from my other blog which we do to keep friends/family who we know in the real world up to date on our family life in new zealand. i thought it might be of interest here too, so here it is as an extra bonus post !

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i've been taking a few photos of natural kiwi type things over the last few weeks, so here's a special bonus feature of some kiwi things. first up is a tree known as the 'kiwi christmas tree' as it blooms with these red flowers each year to coincide with christmas. It's actualy called a pohutukawa tree. they really are dramatic, especially against a blue sky and seem to be everywhere. the one below is from a couple of weeks ago, and the one at the bottom from yesterday. read more here

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next up is the new zealand fantail. this chap (or chapess) was flirting for a photo in a sculpture park we visited. There were a number of Tuis flapping round our heads in the same place, but they moved much too quickly for me to grab a photo unfortunately, but i'm sure i'll get a photo eventually.

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the trees above are Kauris. They played a huge part in New Zealand's brief history - with the maoris using their timber for boat building, carving and housing, and the gum creating an industry in itself. At one time Kauri forests covered 1.2 million hectors, but now it's reckoned to be nearer 80,000 hectares. they really are the daddies of the forest.
 
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this is a cabbage tree which has been having a tricky time of late due to sudden illness.

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and these two pictures are just of a huge amount of 'bush'
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inally, here are some pictures of a pukeko which is a funny little chicken like thing with a red beak and a blue belly.
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these aren't great pictures unfortunately as it was walking in long grass. i've no excuse really as these chaps are all over the place, including wandering along the sides of the main motorway
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we even had one wander in to our tiny back garden in our temporary rental place.

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so there you go, just a few of the natural things we've seen wandering or growing around and about.  blah blah blah.  no snow here.


UPDATE:  My friend Andy left a comment on this, but comments are broken so it didn't publish.  but i wanted to share it with you, so here's what he said:

great photos!  a minor correction - Maori words eg Kauri do not suffer
an 's' in the plural.  The tree, a group of trees and the wood are all
'Kauri' - the s being a european consonant that does not exist in the
Maori alphabet.  Lesson over.  Still loving the photos: "ke te pai! ke
te pai!"

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if you'd told me about mannequins in new zealand before we emigrated i wouldn't have believed you.  but they are absolutely fantastic and get better by the day

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this chap was selling snake oil magnetic therapy bandsand his armless cap wearing mannequin was ably demonstrating how they were to be worn.

sweet as

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the last line on this sign (which is squashed in to a poor bollard) is classic.

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there's something very exciting about the level of detail in kiwi and signs.  the skateboarder on the right is fantastic

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boats in sydney harbour

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kezia drew this picture of me.  i'm very proud of it (and her)

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xmas is weird in the southern hemisphere.  it doesn't get dark until 9pm and it's very warm.

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remember kids - he's always watching

by the way, here's the excellent talk from our church on sunday taking a slightly different look at the Christmas story.  worth listening to for our pastor's kiwi drawl alone !

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i know what will get the crowds in to the food eating competition - we'll tell them we'll post their video on youtube.  how exclusive is that ?

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i went up here, had a thoroughly miserable time and i even suspect their x-ray machine broke my big camera.  highly unimpressed (literally).  oh well.  it was the only bad part of my trip.

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something strange happened to Burger King in Australia and they are called Hungry Jacks.  there's probably a reason for that.  perhaps related to the Australian's growing republican sentiment ?

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good to see a sign in night time colours.

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i'm not convinced this chap's skinny shovel is going to make much headway against that pile of dirt.

or perhaps he fired his arrow in to a sleeping blob and has gone to retrieve it.

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high pedestrian activity is a great phrase.  makes me think of stoners. 

but once i got past the drug image, i looked at the pictures themselves, and none of those strike me as particularly active.

so perhaps it's a double bluff.

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poor old fire men.  life is sometimes very depressing and we all need a little boost sometimes.  when they open this up there are all sorts of encouraging words and phrases to help them on their way.  we all need that sometime.

by the way, you're looking great today and you're having a really positive impact on those around you.  keep up the good work dear funkypancake reader

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living in a land with little recent human history i enjoyed seeing some old stuff in australia.  even if it was an ice cream advert from probably 50 years ago.  that's ancient in new zealand terms.

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good advice given the situation

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here's a classic bit of road which just stops and goes no where.

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apologies for the numerous signage pictures this week.  australia was full of boss signage

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is this meant to help people who can't read ?  if so, best to stick to all pictures or all words.  otherwise it looks a bit like a top trumps card.

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old boat

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newer boat and secret submarine (shhhh, don't tell anyone)

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xmas tree in the thirty degree heat.

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i finally got to meet Andy in Auckland.  He's a friend of good friends in the UK and has been fantastic at 'praying us in' to New Zealand over the last year. Including one moment when i was in the NZ embassy in the UK where an admin error threatened to derail our visa process.  Andy was at that moment on Twitter and a few arrow prayers later, everything was sorted ! 

anyway, it was great to meet him in person and find he lived up to my expectations as a thoroughly nice/jolly/welcoming chap !

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we had our office xmas party yesterday.  the theme was wild west. 

my desk-neighbourhood went as characters from Outrageous Fortune, which is a top NZ TV show.  i was munter (if you can't tell from the picture)

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the party wasn't actually in the office.  but here's the scene before the departure.  just like a normal friday afternoon.

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the party itself was very good actually with people dressed in all sorts of comedy costumes doing comedy things in a nice friendly kiwi manner

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here's a man adjusting the polystyrene bits in the snow globe.  it's the second time i've seen polystyrene bits in the last week - last sunday night i lay on a bean bag looking up at the underside of an umbrella at sydney observatory.  we had to lay on bean bags on the floor looking up at the rather basic start display projected on to the underside of the umbrella

when we got up to leave there were polystyrene bits all over the floor due to a leaky bean bag.  but it looks like little stars had escaped from the planetarium

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oh, and here's the 20 foot santa where i met a friend for morning tea yesterday.  you can see a much better photo of santa and a bit of history at this excellent website here

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this is a close up of that mannequin in the local mall (maul) which i've photed before.  she's definitely not right

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i've been publishing our family pictures elsewhere so funkypancake is now less autobiographical.  but anyway, here's a picture of jane with an egg benedict (i think).  a popular local dish (the food, not jane)

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here's the in flight entertainment system on the plane.  the person's in front of me crashed (a plane crash no less) and the attendant reached under the seat to reboot it.  and up popped a friendly penguin and a linux restart procedure.

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what an amazing instrument.  perfect for a snake to hide up i'd imagine.

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i've been in australia for the last few days, but i'm back home in auckland, new zealand again now which is good.  Australia was hot - mid/high 30s and >75% humidity.  NZ is mid 20s i think, so a welcome relief.

anyway, expect an explosion of Sydney picks over the next few weeks !

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i finally got to see jarvis cocker in concert on monday night.  i missed him by a day in both wellington and auckland due to being in the other place on the other night.

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so when i discovered he was playing in Sydney 2 minutes walk from my hotel i was excited.  but gutted when it was sold out

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but luckily i got a return ticket from the box office and enjoyed a marvellous evening.  and was transported back to the time when i was a vague aquaintance of the great man in sheffield.  in fact i once gave him a demo tape, which he lost, but apologised and said he had been looking forward to hearing my song 'the death of bernie winters'

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both of us from sheffield to sydney.  slightly different routes.  but there you go

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great to see chairs in the street in new zealand (outside the police station in case you were wondering)

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strange thing on the front at wellington

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very cute

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this is something we missed from our crate before it arrived - it's our cheese slicer.  we were delighted to be finally reunited

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i love this stuff.  despite (or because?) of the algae

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one thing we miss is good newspapers.

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a dog dispenser to help clean up dog dispenses

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it's the end of the road for the bollards

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great sign.  the shoes were added on. nice job.

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the colours seem a bit weird on this.  sorry about that.

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it's great to see some decent kiwi political graffiti in auckland (quite near my office)

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probably the best brunch in the bays.  a little less self confident (and more local) than the carlsberg equivalent

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bollards for sale in the local hardware shop.  hoorah.

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from back in easter, making this an old new zealand picture

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just for info, this was taken in the UK in the summer.  not sure why i've only just got around to posting it !  Those scooters now have a new home ...

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can you work out what all these items are ?  one of those looks like his wife's face

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our hire car in new zealand had a mini disk player.  it wasn't the newest car ever.  it was also quite bashed up.  but jolly good

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